'Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets' misses heart of matter
I saw this in Russian; something may have been lost in the translation.
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets is a long movie that lacks the heart to place it anywhere near Luc Besson’s other sci-fi cult hit. Dane DeHaan plays the title character as smarmy, and (spoiler alert) the typical back and forth love story follows. Unfortunately, there is no chemistry between the 2 actors and the philandering past of major Valerian makes it highly unlikely that someone as capable as Sargent Laureline would fall for him. (Or at least, we hope that she is smarter than that.) Clive Owens chews the scenery as if he hasn’t eaten for a week, and it’s not a pretty sight.
If the love story were the only stupid thing about the movie, it might be forgiven. After all, Hollywood is filled with stupid love stories that people go and buy every day. However, the tribute to Huey, Dewey and Louie were both creepy and annoying and created a side quest with a throwaway captain character and an extra 15 minutes spent exploring a place that we had already spent too much time in. (Jessica Rabbit has a much shorter cameo in the film.) The Na'vi, I mean, the inhabitants of Mul hearken to closely to Avatar in style, but they are among the least when it comes to the number, types and designs of aliens in the City of a Thousand Planets.
The movie still has some good points. Namely, Rihanna, who literally plays every man’s dream, even Ethan Hawke! Hawke also does great with his small role.
Overall, Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets is a meandering visual show that is best viewed in 2D. It’s too dark and sometimes blurry in 3D. Forget about the story, don’t expect the Fifth Element, and you may be able to make it from the 1970s to 2700 a.d.
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets is a long movie that lacks the heart to place it anywhere near Luc Besson’s other sci-fi cult hit. Dane DeHaan plays the title character as smarmy, and (spoiler alert) the typical back and forth love story follows. Unfortunately, there is no chemistry between the 2 actors and the philandering past of major Valerian makes it highly unlikely that someone as capable as Sargent Laureline would fall for him. (Or at least, we hope that she is smarter than that.) Clive Owens chews the scenery as if he hasn’t eaten for a week, and it’s not a pretty sight.
If the love story were the only stupid thing about the movie, it might be forgiven. After all, Hollywood is filled with stupid love stories that people go and buy every day. However, the tribute to Huey, Dewey and Louie were both creepy and annoying and created a side quest with a throwaway captain character and an extra 15 minutes spent exploring a place that we had already spent too much time in. (Jessica Rabbit has a much shorter cameo in the film.) The Na'vi, I mean, the inhabitants of Mul hearken to closely to Avatar in style, but they are among the least when it comes to the number, types and designs of aliens in the City of a Thousand Planets.
The movie still has some good points. Namely, Rihanna, who literally plays every man’s dream, even Ethan Hawke! Hawke also does great with his small role.
Overall, Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets is a meandering visual show that is best viewed in 2D. It’s too dark and sometimes blurry in 3D. Forget about the story, don’t expect the Fifth Element, and you may be able to make it from the 1970s to 2700 a.d.